I love "different"

I have often thanked my parents and my upbringing that allowed me to work in the outside world whilst still upholding the values and morals that my parents have instilled in me.It is through this journey that has allowed me to meet different types of people .Meeting someone who is totally different from you is so refreshing and offers you so many lessons that you learn and keep with you for the rest of your life,Meeting people of different races,cultural groups and backgrounds has allowed me to appreciate diversity and helped broaden my mind .Every once in a while i always come across people who are just so beautifully unique and different from anyone i know.This person is usually the individual who does not conform to the norms of society and is so beautiful in their ability to be themselves always.

Unfortunately instead of appreciating someone for their genuine behavior society ridicules them and judges them for being themselves.This is very prevalent among the Muslim and overall Indian community.People are respected if they dress in a certain brand ,speak a certain way and are simply able to fit in with the rest.I cannot and will not waste too much time on people who have their minds so narrowed that there isn't place for much else to settle in.If you are okay with being judgmental and base your impressions of people on shallow aspects then so be that .However this message is entirely for those that don't fit in,are always told how different they are.......

You are a breath of fresh air among all things fake and pretentious. I look forward to meeting you anywhere especially in a crowd where you don't seem to be fitting in. You are special simply because you are "you" and you aren't afraid to be real and genuine.Surround yourself with people who love you for being yourself since the worst thing you could do is change .The world needs more people who are an original copy of themselves .



"You don't fit in because you stand out "

Feedback

 I would like to thank those who did email me with feedback.The response was amazing and surprising! It was delightful being appreciated and having people tell me they have been reading all the posts.Please do continue to email me or comment on the posts as i would  love to hear the opinions of the readers !Hearing from you has motivated me to continue writing,thank you so much for all the support.

Why is my chai different from yours

I am one of those annoying people who behave as if my world would end if I don't have tea and I also often believe that that one cup of tea is the answer to most if not all my problems that I encounter during the day .I don't mean to make a huge deal out of one cup of tea but I swear I am not exaggerating or placing undue importance on that one cup of tea. I just wish everyone could experience the emotions I associate with tea. So I am  going to make an attempt to explain myself in the hope that by the end of this post you try a cup of chai yourself.......

Being a passionate tea drinker you would assume its the first thing I do upon rising however it is actually done after I have woken up extra early to complete chores before work so that I have ample time to make the tea and sit down to have it .The reason for the tea dead line being that I would like to have done what I had to before leaving the house by the time I sit down to that one cup of tea before  facing the crazy day .It is a time I choose to reflect on most things, dread some and look forward to some parts the day ahead. Most importantly it is a time that I spend entirely with myself and of course with my thoughts that flow so freely whilst drinking in that beautiful bit of caffeine .....heaven in a cup and all the motivation needed to begin the day.

I make sure that this is a time I spend entirely with myself therefore getting up extra early or getting to bed abit later is a small sacrifice that gives me an opportunity to reflect upon my actions and the path my life seems to be taking. The only person you should always be in total peace with is yourself and for that you have to spend time with you .You are special, you make mistakes that you need to correct, you are unique and most importantly you are you and you should enjoy being that person without the need for acceptance from anyone .All this can be realized and reinforced by spending that little quality time with yourself each day.

So.....the next time someone seems to be in a hurry to have that special cup of tea do remember why we passionate tea drinkers seem to think that ............."our chai is different from yours"

TRAFFIC................

Often people have writers block but i have been experiencing some sort of traffic with regard to how much i would love to write about!.So many topics so little time.......

Please look out for the following during the week :

A short but direct post about the questions i have received from people about the boycott of Woolworths.

A very frank hardcore approach to why people resort to suicide.....not for the faint heart.

The apple of my eye ,the most innocent amazing little creature with eyes that melt my heart and assure me i am  loved every time i look into them......my furry friend.....bunny.

Thanking god for the gift of good girlfriends....

My really disappointing year....cliche but i guarantee you it is seasoned with a unique take that will leave you feeling great !

A good cuppa........makes the world right .Why is my chai different from yours .....

Till then.....toodles my lovelies.Today's parting shot.......

"There is nothing sexier than an intelligent conversation"

Its not logic,its scary,its heartbreaking ,its brutal,it has no mercy.........it is CRIME

I am every bit the patriotic South African ,i am incredibly proud of my land .However the reality of our country is that it is currently poverty stricken and crime infested.Having being a victim of  crime many times myself i have lived through it and learnt to now live with the fear of having my life threathened when i least expect it.We are all in danger even in the vicinity of our own homes.Since we are all in the system one would assume we would be understanding of each others situations however this is not always the case .After my ordeals i was incredibly grateful to be safe and alive by the good grace of god I had many people who had supported me and helped me to deal with the fear and trauma however there were those few that just didnt quite get it.The random "why did you not do this rather or why were you there at that time"questions always suddenly popped up amongst the" we gald you okays and god is great"

Here is the thing really........when you have a gun held to your head by a  few men who are twice your size rational thinking kind of abandones you for a while.It is really that simple......a gun,a knife to your throat and you are helpless.Please do remember that before you speak to anyone who has been a victim of crime.Understand what a victim of crime means .....it means having your life flash right before your eyes,it means having your dignity ,confidence and ability to reason stripped from you in  a matter of seconds.Do not be someone who has to experience something in order to understand it .I would never wish that  for even the people i dislike.It is not a feeling anyone should have to feel .Its injustice and it is heartbreaking to feel so helpless at the hands of people who call themselves human beings.

Empathy is a beautiful feeling because it means you took a few seconds to place yourself in the other persons shoes. As South Africans who love our country and want to live here we can emphatise with fellow citizens when it comes to fearing crime and the safety of us and our loved ones. This being said I, along with many South Africans hang onto the hope of a crime free nation in a beautiful country that we hold very close to our hearts.

Hate is too great a burden to bear. It injures the hater more than it injures the hated.

There are thousands of people who are either depressed ,sad ,incomplete or as many call it these days....broken. It seems the more the world is advancing in every aspect it has given people an added extra being a life that comes with stress, depression and anxiety. All the above mentioned have become so extreme that it is now no longer a term but an illness that is being treated by medical professionals and various medication. Lets just cut to the chase and get down to the question that most of us ask depressed people......."why are you sad "

That whilst being the most natural question to ask someone it is also the most annoying question because it is not that simple to answer since it always involves another entity .This entity could come in the form of an object, a circumstance and most commonly a person. We look for happiness from the people we love the most since the day we realized we love them is the day we gave them the permission to affect our emotions. There are always sayings ,images and quotes going around about how you really should be the only person to make yourself happy which in my opinion is absolutely crazy .We are human beings and humans are social people. We do not exist in a bubble ,we all require people to keep us happy and smiling .Some of us even live for others and are content doing so .Having said all this ,how do we deal with loved ones making us unhappy and most importantly how do we ensure that we do stay happy even when its not completely in our hands.

We all have many responsibilities and I have always admired people who fulfill those responsibilities regardless of the situations. We have responsibilities to other people and no matter how we feel about them at the time ,we have to be responsible and mature enough to carry out our duties towards them. Like wise there are also responsibilities we have towards ourselves and one of them being.....to never give up on making ourselves happy. People in your life are going to mess up, it is understandable because they are also in their own pursuit of happiness. Don't spend your life capitalizing on what someone did to you .....forgive their mistakes and free yourself of the anger and hatred. You love them too much to even spend a minute hating them and of course do not forget that as amazing as they are they too are human Move forward and beyond it with the promise of entrusting yourself with the responsibility of finding peace and happiness and most importantly never hating someone who does you down.. If you fall down 9 times use the tenth time to get up again.

Once you learn that you cannot be angry at people for making you sad you will be able to find peace within yourself no matter how bad life gets for you .I have always placed peace above happiness because it is peace within you that makes sure that your heart stays clean and only wishes well for those that hurt you. My thoughts are very scattered today as I am not in the best of places but.....I still have my peace :-) and I hope you hold onto yours too.

Ears that want to listen and a heart that wants to understand

How often is it that we voice the complaint of us being misunderstood......its become a regular thing......that we often have a problem with most of the world since we believe we are misunderstood and we spend hours trying  to explain ourselves and prove ourselves right at times at the cost of proving someone else wrong.Why do we keep defending our actions to people that have already decided that we we are wrong ?

The mind is really the most powerful tool we will ever have and  therefore it is also the easiest tool to play with and manipulate. It is easier to believe what we want to hear and when this vital  information comes from someone we have a particular weakness for we are not able to work with facts.We simply take it all at face value and our common sense is distorted by our rage at the idea of being "betrayed".So should we now make  sure that every loved one in our lives always speaks the truth??That is never going to happen.....at some point we have to decide to teach our brain to distinguish right from wrong. Believing everything you hear is  like totally abandoning your own sense of right and wrong and relying on someone else's brain to decide for you.The truth is no third person can be held responsible for creating a misunderstanding between two people .We are all given the ability to reason things out and deep down your heart will always have all the answers waiting for you .

Having a life that's planned out,put together and completely organised is great but make sure that this comes with a mind that is strong,able to withstand the poison that its fed with  and most importantly tell your heart to help you make decisions regarding people and situations because the heart is something that reminds your brain that it felt love,gratitude and care at some point and its these feelings that help you avoid an unnecessary misunderstanding.

Coming back to being on the receiving end of being misunderstood.This can either be a really sad situation for you or you could stand to gain a lot from it.Promise yourself to have a mind that is not easily poisoned with the venom of suspicion that eventually causes a rift in relationships that were true to you.Have a heart that recognises who to love because the world will have you loving the people you should hate and hating the people you should love.Never do to someone what was done to you and lastly,offer to people the things you would love offered to you....these things being a chance to explain and of course...."an ear that listens and a heart that understands"

Be a nice human

SUNDAY, 21 SEPTEMBER 2014

My journey is no different from most .We set goals for ourselves and hope to stay true to them.I too have done this and have very many goals.Some have been achieved ,are in the process of being achieved and some are untouched but simply get renewed each day.I have created this blog so that i can share my journey with myself since i needed to fulfill a promise i made to myself years ago.The promise to first and foremost be content with the beauty of being ordinary and to always strive to just be "a human " since the gift of being human lies in the most beautiful part of being human which is having the gift of humanity.

This might sound like the life of someone who isn't particularly an over achiever and lacks motivation to do greater things,however i have chased the extraordinary for too many years of my life and i have achieved many things but none of them being peace with myself and who i have become.My life  changed the day a colleague was asked to describe me in one of our activities at work and all she said was "ordinary"....i immediately asked her why she used that really flattering selection of words....of course she did not answer me simply brushing it off by saying its not a bad thing.Life always gives us the tasks of finding an answer ourselves since discovering anything on your own is just that bit more rewarding .

Often the past is something we are told to forget but i think it is imperative to turn around whilst going ahead .It ensures you never forget vital pieces of your life that are going to be building your future.In a world where extraordinary and being the best is the order of the day ,i am embarking on a journey to being ordinary and yes never forgetting.......being "human"