Hate is too great a burden to bear. It injures the hater more than it injures the hated.

There are thousands of people who are either depressed ,sad ,incomplete or as many call it these days....broken. It seems the more the world is advancing in every aspect it has given people an added extra being a life that comes with stress, depression and anxiety. All the above mentioned have become so extreme that it is now no longer a term but an illness that is being treated by medical professionals and various medication. Lets just cut to the chase and get down to the question that most of us ask depressed people......."why are you sad "

That whilst being the most natural question to ask someone it is also the most annoying question because it is not that simple to answer since it always involves another entity .This entity could come in the form of an object, a circumstance and most commonly a person. We look for happiness from the people we love the most since the day we realized we love them is the day we gave them the permission to affect our emotions. There are always sayings ,images and quotes going around about how you really should be the only person to make yourself happy which in my opinion is absolutely crazy .We are human beings and humans are social people. We do not exist in a bubble ,we all require people to keep us happy and smiling .Some of us even live for others and are content doing so .Having said all this ,how do we deal with loved ones making us unhappy and most importantly how do we ensure that we do stay happy even when its not completely in our hands.

We all have many responsibilities and I have always admired people who fulfill those responsibilities regardless of the situations. We have responsibilities to other people and no matter how we feel about them at the time ,we have to be responsible and mature enough to carry out our duties towards them. Like wise there are also responsibilities we have towards ourselves and one of them being.....to never give up on making ourselves happy. People in your life are going to mess up, it is understandable because they are also in their own pursuit of happiness. Don't spend your life capitalizing on what someone did to you .....forgive their mistakes and free yourself of the anger and hatred. You love them too much to even spend a minute hating them and of course do not forget that as amazing as they are they too are human Move forward and beyond it with the promise of entrusting yourself with the responsibility of finding peace and happiness and most importantly never hating someone who does you down.. If you fall down 9 times use the tenth time to get up again.

Once you learn that you cannot be angry at people for making you sad you will be able to find peace within yourself no matter how bad life gets for you .I have always placed peace above happiness because it is peace within you that makes sure that your heart stays clean and only wishes well for those that hurt you. My thoughts are very scattered today as I am not in the best of places but.....I still have my peace :-) and I hope you hold onto yours too.

Ears that want to listen and a heart that wants to understand

How often is it that we voice the complaint of us being misunderstood......its become a regular thing......that we often have a problem with most of the world since we believe we are misunderstood and we spend hours trying  to explain ourselves and prove ourselves right at times at the cost of proving someone else wrong.Why do we keep defending our actions to people that have already decided that we we are wrong ?

The mind is really the most powerful tool we will ever have and  therefore it is also the easiest tool to play with and manipulate. It is easier to believe what we want to hear and when this vital  information comes from someone we have a particular weakness for we are not able to work with facts.We simply take it all at face value and our common sense is distorted by our rage at the idea of being "betrayed".So should we now make  sure that every loved one in our lives always speaks the truth??That is never going to happen.....at some point we have to decide to teach our brain to distinguish right from wrong. Believing everything you hear is  like totally abandoning your own sense of right and wrong and relying on someone else's brain to decide for you.The truth is no third person can be held responsible for creating a misunderstanding between two people .We are all given the ability to reason things out and deep down your heart will always have all the answers waiting for you .

Having a life that's planned out,put together and completely organised is great but make sure that this comes with a mind that is strong,able to withstand the poison that its fed with  and most importantly tell your heart to help you make decisions regarding people and situations because the heart is something that reminds your brain that it felt love,gratitude and care at some point and its these feelings that help you avoid an unnecessary misunderstanding.

Coming back to being on the receiving end of being misunderstood.This can either be a really sad situation for you or you could stand to gain a lot from it.Promise yourself to have a mind that is not easily poisoned with the venom of suspicion that eventually causes a rift in relationships that were true to you.Have a heart that recognises who to love because the world will have you loving the people you should hate and hating the people you should love.Never do to someone what was done to you and lastly,offer to people the things you would love offered to you....these things being a chance to explain and of course...."an ear that listens and a heart that understands"

Be a nice human

SUNDAY, 21 SEPTEMBER 2014

My journey is no different from most .We set goals for ourselves and hope to stay true to them.I too have done this and have very many goals.Some have been achieved ,are in the process of being achieved and some are untouched but simply get renewed each day.I have created this blog so that i can share my journey with myself since i needed to fulfill a promise i made to myself years ago.The promise to first and foremost be content with the beauty of being ordinary and to always strive to just be "a human " since the gift of being human lies in the most beautiful part of being human which is having the gift of humanity.

This might sound like the life of someone who isn't particularly an over achiever and lacks motivation to do greater things,however i have chased the extraordinary for too many years of my life and i have achieved many things but none of them being peace with myself and who i have become.My life  changed the day a colleague was asked to describe me in one of our activities at work and all she said was "ordinary"....i immediately asked her why she used that really flattering selection of words....of course she did not answer me simply brushing it off by saying its not a bad thing.Life always gives us the tasks of finding an answer ourselves since discovering anything on your own is just that bit more rewarding .

Often the past is something we are told to forget but i think it is imperative to turn around whilst going ahead .It ensures you never forget vital pieces of your life that are going to be building your future.In a world where extraordinary and being the best is the order of the day ,i am embarking on a journey to being ordinary and yes never forgetting.......being "human"